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Sick fish and trouser splits: the all-time best excuses for taking the day off work

funny sick day excuses

A hilarious study from ukbathrooms.com revealed that 27% of Britons in full-time employment regularly ‘hide’ in the toilets at work to pass the time – wasting about £1.3 billion in lost productivity. On average people hide for 8.6 minutes, three times a week.

This got us chortling, but also thinking about the funny excuses that employees of SMEs give for calling in sick – especially around this time of year when your employees might have indulged a tad too much! All of the following are 100 per cent real excuses people have given for pulling a sickie…

Animal Magic

Did your dog eat your homework? Is your goldfish having a crisis? Animals can be unpredictable, after all…

“My dog has had a big fright and I don’t want to leave him”

“My fish is sick”

“There are bats in my hair”

“I injured my back chasing after a beaver”

Fashion and beauty

We all have bad hair days, but sometimes a bad hair day can go way beyond what a human can cope with.

“I’ve had a hair dye disaster – it’s all gone orange”

“My trousers split on the way to work”

“My ex has taken all my pants and hidden them”

Ill-considered food and drink choices

It doesn’t have to be booze – food comes in dangerous packaging, and some people will eat anything.

“I drank too much and fell asleep on someone’s floor – I don’t know where I am”

“A can of baked beans landed on my big toe”

“I drank anti-freeze by mistake and have to go to hospital”

The plain weird

When all else fails, some people try to baffle their boss with excuses that are just downright bizarre.

“I’m too upset after watching The Hunger Games”

“My toe is trapped in the bath tap”

“A truck full of flour backed up and dumped it all into my convertible”

“My 12 year old stole my car”

What’s the weirdest excuse that’s been given in your workplace? Let us know below!

Sources: CareerBuilderThe WashingtonianHuffPo

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